"fearlessly expanding the feminine voice"

When I first joined the Redbud Writers Guild, I saw this phrase on their website: 

"Fearlessly expanding the feminine voice in our churches, communities, and culture."

That resonated with me.

Because even though I have a voice and I want to use it, I am still timid about speaking up in the catholic (read: universal) Church. 

Perhaps this is curious to you.

You might be asking one of two questions:

1.  Why does the feminine voice need to be expanded?

2.  Why would anyone be fearful about using their voice?

I write today from a place of love - I am not angry or bitter as I write these words.  But I do want to explain why that phrase resonated with me and why I think the catholic Church needs to intentionally make steps to be more inclusive to women. 

*****

I am the researcher in our family.

I have researched everything from housing options to strollers, partly because I think researching is fun and partly because I want to make wise, informed decisions for our family.

So when we moved to Omaha it was only natural that I started researching churches.  I would collect all the information and then talk through each church with my husband, pulling up their websites so he could look too.

I scoured their websites and listened to podcasts of previous sermons.  I downloaded bulletins and researched their childcare policies.  

And I always read about the pastors.  At that point, we were only considering churches who had male pastors.

That's when I noticed a sad trend.

As I looked at their book recommendations, and as I searched their social media accounts, all the Christian authors, pastors, and speakers they recommended and were connected with were men.  On a very long booklist, I saw only one female author mentioned, but only about "female issues" (i.e. one book on the wife's side of marriage and one book on parenting)

These pastors didn't have women speaking into their lives.

Of course, you could argue that my method for finding this out wasn't the most accurate. You could say that who someone follows on Twitter is an arbitrary way of finding out who they listen to.

But I think it is indicative of more.

Are these men doing it intentionally? 

I don't think so.  

But they are ignoring half of the church.

Intentionally or not, it sends the message that not only should women not teach, they also don't have anything valuable to add to theology or Christianity.


*****

I attended a church with all male pastors.  That wasn't an oversight, it was what they believed.

This church sent a group of their pastors overseas to mentor local pastors in a country where the government is trying to repress Christianity, yet it was flourishing.

When I saw a picture of the trip, I laughed.  A tiny room of someone's apartment was packed, wall-to-wall with women.

The church set a group of all male pastors (men who believed that only men should be pastors) to teach a group of all FEMALE pastors.  Really, it was comical.

They came home talking about how much God was doing in this country.  How amazing it was!

I wondered if these men ever considered that they had half of their team benched.  And maybe, just maybe they would play a better game if they used all their players.

Did they consider these female pastors second-best?  Did they think God was only using women because He couldn't find any men in the country?  Or does God just use people? People who love Him and are committed to Him.

When I tried to bring this up to someone, it was excused as "cultural".

Instead of laughing, I got angry that time.  But I didn't press the argument because no one wanted to be pressed on it.

Passages about women being silent in church and men alone being pastors were taken literally at this church.  If I had tried to say that those passages didn't apply today because they were cultural and were written to people over 2,000 years before, this church would have said that I was denying biblical truth.

Yet here we were, two churches at the exact same point in history, and the difference could be dismissed as cultural?


*****

She laughed as she told me, "When they gave me the job, they called me the children's minister, but if they had hired a man, the position would have been children's pastor."

Exact same job description.  Exact same work load.  Exact same responsibilities.

Different title.

Whether or not that woman was called a pastor, she was pastoring.

It was semantics.

*****


I've heard it in college.  I've heard it in churches.

A prophet just means a preacher.

They say this when we're studying the Old Testament prophets, of course.

They don't mention the six women in the Bible who are called prophets.

They don't mention that Act 2 quotes Joel saying that a sign of the Holy Spirit coming will be that "sons and daughters will prophesy" (emphasis mine).

They don't mention I Corinthians where Paul calmly gives instructions for when (not if) women prophesy in Church.

So...a prophet means a preacher, unless that prophet is a woman?

*****

When I've said these things to people before, I usually hear one thing from them.

"Don't you think it is self-seeking?  Don't you think women just want these things because they want attention?  Aren't we called to humility?"

Here is my answer: It can be self-seeking.  They may simply want attention.  And yes, we are called to humility.

But all of these thing can be said for men as well.

Yet when I've seen men who say they feel called to preach or called to the ministry, I see them encouraged.  People are excited about it.

But women?

When a woman says she feels called to ministry (or to preach), her motives are immediately questioned.  Her character is vetted.  She has to prove herself over and over again.  

These women aren't always self-seeking.  In fact, often it is a bold step of faith for them to simply say aloud that they feel called to preach - they know the reception they will receive.

A person's motives may not be pure when they decide to become a pastor, but I think that has much less to do with their gender and more to do with their character.

*****

Do you see the need to expand the feminine voice yet?  And do you see why sometimes we are fearful about using our voices?

Regardless of what is said, the feminine voice isn't always welcome in the Church.

the best of the month: APRIL

Last month I started a series called The Best of the Month where I share my favorite articles and blog posts from the past month.  Each day I read multiple articles so when I come across one that I really like, I save the link.  At the end of the month I sort through all the links, divide them into categories, and share my favorite from each one.  Hope that you enjoy these reads as much as I did.


PARENTING

Jessica at Jessica Lynn Writes: Hope For My Military Child

This morning I was holding my newborn daughter, and for the first time I felt a twinge of sadness. She didn't choose this lifestyle. Her dad will deploy in the future and leave her for months at a time. Through her tears, I'll have to explain why he left and comfort her when all she wants is him. I love that she'll grow up experiencing new places, but it absolutely breaks my heart that she'll see her family's faces more on a computer screen than in person. 

This may be the life I chose, but I didn't necessarily choose it for her, so I hope I can show her the positive aspects of this military life and I hope they'll outweigh the negative just a little bit. I hope the friends we make across the world will become her surrogate family, giving her the physical hugs, kisses, and playtime when her real family is far away. I hope my husband and I will be a good example as parents so when he jets off for the sandbox she'll know he's coming back to a family bound by love. I hope, whether we move across the world or down the street, that she'll understand—as cliche as this is—that her home isn't defined by an address, but by where her heart is planted.

BLOGGING

Laura at Hollywood Housewife: Blogging is My Favorite: When I Blog

Your favorite bloggers - those that write well, post frequently, or photograph recipes, fashion, or crafts - are spending a lot of time on their blogs. They’re not squeezing it in during naptime. If they don’t have some sort of help...or kids in school all day, I guarantee you that they’re getting up extra early or working late into the night. Solid blogging takes a lot of time. The content itself takes hours, but then if you want anyone to see it you have to have a presence on social media, respond to reader and professional emails, and deal with various backend issues.

FEMINISM

Sandra Glahn at Her.meneutics: The Feminists We Forgot 

This "new woman" is not an invention of second-wave feminism either. Betty Friedan did not start the "woman movement;" Christians did. Motivated by the belief that men and women were made in God's image to "rule the earth" together, these pro-woman, pro-justice believers sought to right wrongs for those who had less social influence.

HEALTH

Eve O. Schaub at Everyday Health: Our Year of No Sugar: One Family's Grand Adventure 

 I wanted to see how hard it would be to have our family — me, my husband, and our two children (ages 6 and 11) — spend an entire year eating foods that contained no added sugar. We’d cut out anything with an added sweetener, be it table sugar, honey, molasses, maple syrup, agave or fruit juice. We also excluded anything made with fake sugar or sugar alcohols. Unless the sweetness was attached to its original source (e.g., a piece of fruit), we didn’t eat it. 

Once we started looking we found sugar in the most amazing places: tortillas, sausages, chicken broth, salad dressing, cold cuts, crackers, mayonnaise, bacon, bread, and even baby food. 

CHRISTIANITY

(I'm including two from this category because there were SO MANY amazing choices - I finally narrowed it down to these two)

Rebecca Wohl at Commission on Biblical Gender Equality: I Can't Change My Spots

I took her hands even tighter into my own and led her to a chair so we could talk. Her sweet spirit and kind words moved my heart, and I could tell we had more to chat about. 

“Well, after all these years of believing that women shouldn’t be in the pulpit, I just can’t change how I feel about that. But your – ,” she hesitated again.

I smiled again and tried one more time, “Sermon?”

 “Ok, for lack of a better word, yes, your sermon was really one of the best sermons I have ever heard, and it challenged me in my faith – imagine that, after 80 years of walking with Jesus.”

I was very humbled and grateful for her generous words, but wanted to push further…  “Ah, thank you so much! It was my true honor to bring God’s Word today. I’m so thankful that the Spirit ministered to you. So you are not sure if women should preach, but you think that maybe, I’m an OK preacher though?” I pushed further.

“Oh yes! The best! But that’s just you honey, I don’t know about any other woman out there.”

“So, if I’m a good preacher, and I am a woman, isn’t it possible that there are other good preachers out there who are women too?”

James Hoskins at Christ & Pop Culture: "God's Not Dead" and the Angry Atheist Professor: That Was Not My Experience 

...I’m concerned that the movie God’s Not Dead perpetuates a false stereotype: that of the bully atheist philosophy professor who is out to destroy every Christian student’s faith. I’m sure there are some of those professors out there. But I doubt that they are a majority. Even if they were, though, I don’t think caricatures and stereotypes are helpful. When we uncritically accept a caricature of someone, we become less gracious people. Instead, we become more dismissive, presumptuous, and defensive. We also become more likely to misinterpret an honest challenge to our faith as an “attack,” and react in a way that is less than winsome.

MILITARY

Kim at She is Fierce: The Sound of a Silent Doorbell

All I could do was wait to see if my doorbell would ring. 

When morning came and it hadn't, I received a phone call confirming that Dh was OK.

What I felt then was almost harder than what I had experienced the entire sleepless night.

 It was the guilt that follows that moment of relief.

Because it wasn't my love, but it was most certainly someones.

It wasn't my heart broken, but the hearts of 4 other families.

MY WRITING

What Kept Me in Church Was Communion

When my eyes locked into the lay minister’s and he said, “Christ’s Body, broken for you,” I believed him.  When I dipped that scrap of bread, humble yet holy, into the communion wine, it sent shivers down my spine.  “Christ’s blood, spilled for you.”  This was the Gospel, simple and true.

It wasn’t a fancy program or a new method to “reach my generation.” It was following the example of Christ when He said, “Do this in remembrance of me.”  And I did: I remembered Him.

When the cynicism of Christianity scabbed over my heart, the simplicity of the Gospel ripped it open again.  In my remembrance of Him, the offenses I held against the modern Church faded away.  

What is the best thing you read (or wrote!) this month?

When Numbers Define Us.

(photo source Chrisoph on Flickr via Creative Commons license)

Last year I had a startling revelation.  In the course of one week, I had casual conversations with seven different women and noticed that every single one of them mentioned wanting to lose weight.

It made me a bit sick.

This wasn't a unique week and those women weren't unique either.  These are the same words I have heard my entire life from all different women.  And they are the same words I have said many times.  I had simply started paying attention.

This is the narrative we know as women, isn't it?  If we follow the social script, we should always be talking about how we are trying to lose weight.

But I am tired of this narrative and I'm throwing away that script.

I am disgusted because we are doing this to ourselves and we are doing it to our children.  Our daughters are learning the patterns that they will repeat: to despise their bodies and focus on their numbers instead of their strengths.  Our sons are learning that women's bodies should always be smaller.  Smaller, smaller, and smaller.  They are learning that women should take up as little space as possible.  This is dangerous for all of us.

When we live focused on losing weight, we have already lost.

I want to make better lifestyle choices because of what I gain, not because of what I want to lose.

I want to make better food choices because it makes me feel better.  Because my body function best when it has the proper fuel.  And I want to exercise so that I will be stronger and more agile.

Instead of trying to shrink the number on the scale, I can focus on gaining energy and strength and a clear mind.

Is it just the number on the scale, though?  Or do I let other numbers define me?

Last week I watched several popular bloggers engage in a Twitter conversation.  They were discussing ways to get more followers and being more effective bloggers.

I was shocked.  Truly.

In my mind, these ladies had all "arrived."  They have written books and spoken at conferences.  They have had large companies as sponsors.  They have thousands of followers.  Their platforms are the type that no-name bloggers that me can only dream of.  And yet...they were all still looking for more readers and ways to be better bloggers.

I don't blame them for wanting more readers.  This is the truth of social media: It is all about the numbers.

As much as writers hate it, our platform matters.  It is all a game of how many followers and likes and page views and retweets we can get.

But when numbers are king, no one wins.

There is never a correct number.  Never, ever, ever.  You will always want more (or less).  You will always be focused on the next number.

I, too, fall into this trap and play this game.  But I know this to be supremely true: Humans cannot be quantified.

My worth has no correlation to the number on the scale or the number inside my waistband.  My value is not measured by the number of comments and page views I receive.

And so, my friends and my sisters, can we please stop with this game of numbers?  Can we rewrite the social scripts for our children?  Can we live in the freedom that numbers don't matter in life?

Books for the Journey: Women and Christianity

When I was an undergrad at our Christian college, I had a group presentation about women's roles in the Church.  If I recall correctly, we had about a month to prepare.  That sounds like a lot of time, but a month in the middle of college (with four or five other classes, extracurricular activities and lots of other homework assignments to juggle) goes by pretty quickly.  Our professor's goal was for us to take that month, do an in-depth study and emerge with a conclusion.  But a month isn't a lot of time to tackle a subject that complicated!

Up to that point, I had always been taught (and believed) that women couldn't be pastors or elders or have leadership over men in churches.  But I was beginning to question all that.  I saw the inconsistencies in hermeneutics, the incomplete arguments and knew there must be more to the issue than I had been taught.  But, unfortunately, it was a lot easier to just parrot the opinions I'd been given for years, find a few sources, make my powerpoint and take my easy A.

In a lot of ways, I'm disappointed with myself that I didn't go deeper then because I stood in front of a class and taught complementary views even when I had hesitations.  But to be fair, I think this issue (and many others) has been a lot more of a journey, than an assignment.  I've been researching and discussing this issues for several years now and, while I feel I've made a lot of progress, I don't think that the issue is closed to me yet.  I'm still learning from new writers and friends and still forming my opinions.  Perhaps I'll always be.

Last week I wrote a review of the book Jesus Feminist by Sarah Bessey, which sparked a fun discussion in the comment section and gave me a chance to pull all that knowledge I've been storing up.  As I responded to comments, I realized that I just kept recommending books, which is in line with my undergrad experience.  Majoring in psychology meant a lot of papers and even more references.  And it doesn't hurt that I just happen to like books. ;)  Because of that post, I decided to put together a list of some of my favorite books on women and Christianity.

I'm labeling this "books for the journey" because I want to encourage people to view it that way.  It certainly has been a journey for me, and, in talking with other people, I feel like that's a common sentiment.  I don't expect a complementarian to read my post about Jesus Feminist and immediately change their mind about women's roles in the Church.  But if something I write piques their curiosity and that curiosity causes them to pick up a book and that book causes them to reconsider, THAT is worth it to me.

So here are the books that have helped me on this journey of discovering where women fit into Christianity.  I'm not saying that I agree 100% with each of these books, but each has caused me to think and helped me develop a more robust understanding of feminism and Christianity.  It is VERY hard for me to write 3-4 sentence book reviews, but I'm just giving a quick summary to explain why I'm recommending it.

1. Jesus Feminist: An Invitation to Revisit the Bible's View of Women

Obviously, I liked this book.  You can read my whole review here, but I just say a quick bit here as well.  I appreciated Sarah's gracious tone and how she prays "for unity beyond conformity" (p. 5).  She advocates for "grace and kindness...especially for those who we believe are profoundly wrong" (p. 5).  If you're just beginning to research this subject, this book would be a good one to start with.

2. Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide

Half the Sky is another great book to read if you're just beginning this journey.  And when you do get to the other books on this list, you'll see Half the Sky quoted over and over again!  Kristof and WuDunn explore how women all over the globe have been subjugated simply because of their gender.  Oh, and there's also a documentary by the same name if you feel like I'm listing too many books!  

3. Half the Church: Recapturing God's Global Vision for Women

This title is obviously a play off of Half the Sky, but it's on another important topic: women in the Church.  Carolyn Custis James encourages her readers to look at these issues through a global and historical lens, instead of simply through our American perspective.

4. A Year of Biblical Womanhood: How a Liberated Woman Found Herself Sitting on Her Roof, Covering Her Head, and Calling Her Husband "Master"

I read Rachel's book last year and loved it (although her first book, Evolving in Monkey Town, is still my favorite!).  Rachel spends a year examining (and living!) God's commands for women.  It's funny and thought provoking.  So much more I could say about this book, but I'll leave it at this: read it.

5. Slaves, Women & Homosexuals: Exploring the Hermeneutics of Cultural Analysis

If you're looking for a book that goes in depth on the hermeneutics of women in the Bible, this is it.  It is very academic and I still haven't made it through, but what I have read has been wonderful.  It comes recommended by my friend and mentor, Marlena Graves, who is one of the most trustworthy people I know.

6. Good News for Women: A Biblical Picture of Gender Equality

I read this for a college class my senior year and it was the first book I read from an egalitarian perspective.  Until that point, I had always been taught from a complementary perspective, both implicitly and explicitly.  Groothuis' book gave me the confidence and the curiosity to continue on this journey.

7. ProLife Feminism: Yesterday and Today

 This is in my "to read" pile, but comes highly recommended.  Sometimes in conservative Christian circles, I think we see the word 'feminist' and immediately think of abortion.  And I think that's a dangerous correlation.  Certainly, there are many people who are both feminist and pro-choice.  But this book shows that there is a very strong history of feminists who are also pro-life.  (Side note: I hate the terms pro-life and pro-choice terms as they are misleading and inflammatory, but I am using them here because I think it is the easiest way to explain what I mean)


And if you're looking for something FREE that you can read right now, I recommend this article by The Junia Project dealing with I Timothy 2:12, which is one of the most confusing verses in this conversation.  And make sure you read the comments too!


Okay, it's your turn!  What books have helped you?

**This post contains Amazon Associates links

currently reading: Jesus Feminist

"exploring God's radical notion that women are people, too"

"I'll never fit in with Christian women..."

I said these hushed words to my husband as we left a small group one night.  

Looking back, I can see that it was kind of a silly statement.  The night had been discussions of children and cooking and clothing - things that I actually do enjoy, but they felt frivolous at the time.  I was missing deep conversation and connection.  During the long, lonely hours as a SAHM I was (am) mentally wrestling through all that I read on popular Christian sites.  

Why were these amazing debates taking place online and in books where Christian women spoke with strong voices and yet, when I went to Church, I felt like all the women talked about were recipes and kids and decorating and dieting?  Was the conversation only happening online?  

Reading Sarah Bessey's book, Jesus Feminist

, I'm realizing that I was wrong ( and that I should probably get used to that feeling).  I think that all over Christendom these women - strong women who want to challenge and to be challenged - do exist.  But maybe, like me, they're used to churches telling women to be "gentle and quiet", but not telling them to use leadership skills.  And they're used to churches with a "brain-check" at the front door next to the coat check.  And they're used to feminism being "the f word" in Church.  And so, like me, these women have decided to just take the easy route and keep their voices to hushed tones.

But what I'm realizing is that strong women who want more from the Church are all around me.  And I'm so excited to see where that takes me in the next year of hard conversations and growing friendships and women challenging women to do more and be better.

Whew.  All that was just an intro to my thoughts on the book.  I'll try to hurry up after this.  :)  

{I am a bit self-conscious about posting pictures of myself...and I am a Jesus feminist ;) 

 Also, if you didn't know, Sarah collected pictures of people with similar signs.

I didn't come up with this idea on my own. }

Jesus Feminist

 surprised me.  I expected Sarah Bessey's writing to be bold and scandalous and very heavy on research.  And it was, in some ways.  But what surprised me was how personal this book was.  Sarah wrote to ME.  Her words were like a thick blanket wrapped around my shoulders, cocooning and comforting.  She asks her readers to "lay down our ideas, our neatly organized Bible verses, our carefully crafted arguments" (p.1) and instead, invites us to a conversation.     

From the beginning, Sarah wrote gently and kindly and truthfully.  While many people might have negative stereotypes they associate with the word "feminist" (read: angry, bitter), Sarah's tone is completely different.  It was a bit off-setting for me at the beginning because this book was not what I expected.  If you're looking for a book goes through each verse pertaining to women and painstakingly proves (or disproves) why you should be a feminist, this is not the book you're looking for.  This book is about leaving our entrenched sides and coming together to see the Kingdom of God at work.  It was obvious that the book was well-researched, but it was not scholarly.  

I loved how Sarah used her own life stories (and those of her friends) in this book.  She writes of childhood and childbirth, marriage and ministry, hurts and happiness.  She combines stories and Scriptures and quotes and hard truth, and when it all comes together, it works.  It captured my attention and engaged both my brain and my heart.  

One part stuck out to me: "Often when a woman exhibits leadership, she's accused of having that Jezebel spirit.  I look forward to the day when women with leadership and insight, gifts and talents, callings and prophetic leanings are called out and celebrated as Deborah, instead of silenced as a Jezebel" (p. 92)  Yes.  Yes!  I wish this wasn't revolutionary in western Christianity, but it is!  And I too look forward to the day when women are celebrated as leaders, scholars and pastors in the Church.  

I've read criticism that Sarah's book didn't go far enough.  And I understand where those people are coming from.  In some ways, I do think she could have pushed further.  But I think she ended up with a gracious book that will speak to both sides and will start the conversation rolling in churches.  Rather than focusing on the minute details, Sarah looks at the bigger picture.  To her, being a feminist is being part of the Kingdom of God here on earth.

Before reading this book, I was comfortable calling myself a Christian and a feminist.  But Sarah's book helped me delve deeper into the conflation of those, which I appreciate.  This is a book I plan to read again and will recommend to friends, both male and female.  I am already looking forward to the conversations that will take place because of Jesus Feminist

.

My rating: 5 stars

{Finished book on my little red desk}

If you've read Jesus Feminist

 (or read Sarah's blog), I'd love for you to let me know what you thought! :)

**This post contains Amazon Associates links

on pastors and women and books and wanting more for the Church

**this post has been a long time in the making.  it wasn't something i just quickly threw together.  hope that you can take an equal amount of time to think about it.  :)  **


About a month ago I was looking at church websites and came across a few with reading recommendations.  Awesome.  I love to read.  Especially about theology.  But as I browsed, I noticed a trend:  the books were written by men.

"Surely they weren't ALL written by men?"  You ask.  And you would be correct.  Each list contained exactly one woman author who wrote on women/family issues.  These weren't short lists - one had nine categories with well over a hundred books in all.  But only one woman author.

If this was an isolated situation, perhaps it wouldn't have bothered me so much.  But unfortunately I have seen many cases where women are brushed aside for any sort of leadership position in the religious realm (including colleges and universities) simply because of their sex.

These are the questions I ask:

1.  What kind of message is this sending?

It's sending the message that, as a woman, my experience with God will never be enough.  That I will always be inferior to men simply because of my sex.  I've been in conservative circles for many years so I KNOW all of the arguments.  I know that complementarians say over and over again how much they value women and how the roles are simply different.  And for a long time, I held these views myself.  It has been through careful, long study that I have changed my views.

While I personally disagree, I accept that some churches don't believe that women should be pastors.  Like many issues in the Bible, I believe that we can think differently without despising or demonizing the other side.  But this is where I draw the line.

To the little girl sitting in a pew at Church, she sees that she can never be a pastor because she's a woman.  She can never have a leadership role in Church because she's a woman.  She can never pray from the pulpit because she's a woman.  She can't even pass the offering plate because she's a woman.  And now...she can't even write a book that will be accepted by pastors because she's a woman??  (Although Her.menutics recently posted a thoughtful piece on what happens when churches only allow women to teach indirectly...I really liked their take on it, but I'm just asking for pastors and laity to take the first step and start reading books by women if they aren't already!) 

When my husband was home for lunch today, we were discussing it and I explained it to him like this:  "If you write a book on theology, it is accepted for that and only scrutinized on the basis of whether or not it is theologically correct.  If I write a book on theology, every page is analyzed through the lens of having a woman writer."  My husband would tell you that I have taken more theology classes (and gotten better grades ;) than he has and I do far more reading and studying on these issues.  Yet he will always be more readily accepted in theological circles.

2.  Why aren't our pastors reading books by women?

As I considered these church websites and the lack of women writers, I noticed something else troubling.  One of the pastors wrote book reviews and I noticed that the book written by a women was reviewed.  I went to check it out.  Turns out, he hadn't read the book.  Instead he gave it to his wife to read.  I understand that the book was for women so I don't necessarily have a problem with him asking a woman to review it.  However, he never listed her qualifications to review this book.  It was as if the sole reason she was "worthy" of reviewing the book was based on her sex.  Would he give a theology book to just any man and trust the opinion given?  I doubt it.  Perhaps his wife does have a theological background  - that would be great!  But since that wasn't listed in the introduction to the review, it gave the impression that she was qualified to report on this book because she was a woman.

This pastor was well-read.  It was clear that he cared deeply about theology and was very selective with the books he listed and I appreciated many of his reviews.  But by not reviewing (and not recommending) books by women, it seems as though he thinks he can learn nothing from them.  There are many women writers from all different background (e.g. if he wanted to find a woman to support his view that women shouldn't be pastors, there are still several women authors he could read!).  There are many gifted writers from a variety of backgrounds including Sister Joan Chittister, Amy Carmichael, Mother Theresa, Edith Schaeffer, Rachel Held Evans, Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Lauren Winner, Elisabeth Elliot, Carolyn Custis James, Beth Moore or Madeleine L'Engle (those are just the ones who quickly came to mind).

I want to give this pastor the benefit of the doubt.  Perhaps he did this unconsciously.  But why hasn't someone called him out?  Why is it that it is perfectly acceptable for pastors to only read books written by men?  Shouldn't they be called out on that?

Before I end, I want to clarify a few things.  While I was referring to a specific Church and pastor here, this is a trend I see in many, many Church and Christian organizations.  I truly am not trying to pull out one rare example and get hung up on it.  Also, it isn't that I don't like this type of church.  On the contrary, many other things about this specific church appealed to me.  That's why the covert sexism bothered me so much.  It wasn't like these churches were Westboro Baptists, on an extreme fringe of religion!  

I suppose that I want more for (and from) the Church.  I want it to be a place where women are appreciated and encouraged to use their gifts (even if those gifts are teaching and leadership).  Many people grew up in churches where women were restricted.  I'm not saying that you have to immediately make the leap to having a women as the main teaching pastor.  But could you please just pick up a book written by a women??  :)  You'll learn something.  I promise!

TED talk: violence & silence (dr. jackson katz)

Sometimes it's hard to figure out how something "went viral".  Like Gangnam Style or the Harlam Shake.  How in the world did those become worldwide trends?!

Other times there are important messages that *need* to go viral.  This is TED talk by Dr. Jackson Katz that I believe is important for our society (really, our world).  I hope that you'll listen and, perhaps, share as well.

I found this specially interesting because my husband and I had just discussed this very topic about a week ago (before I'd heard about this talk).

"Healthy Is the New Skinny"

I am not endorsing everything (or every picture) that this campaign puts out.  As a Christian I believe that ultimately I must find my identity in Christ and look to Him to define me.  But I AM agreeing that this is a serious issue that needs to be addresses in our culture. 

Post this video on your facebook or blog or twitter and share the message with others.  Let's reclaim the definition of beauty.