this glorious maze

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

tonight.

I haven't been writing.

I've been thinking. And reading. And praying. And studying. And processing.

My husband and I have been having serious discussions over the last couple of months about our privacy as a family, and especially about giving our son the space to grow away from the eyes of the world. In this internet-crazed society, there are few things that are kept private. I wonder what it would be like to grow up with your entire childhood documented for strangers to view and I can't say that it is fair to subject my child to this sort of life. I could write much more on the subject, and perhaps I will, but for now I can simply leave it with the fact that we are doing what we think is best for our child in the long run.

So we have decided to separate our family life and this blog. We've set up a private blog which will be accessible to close friends and family where we will share pictures and stories of our life and our baby. In the next few weeks, we'll be removing pictures, some posts and perhaps names from this blog and instead start posting on the other.

This space will return to what it was originally. A quiet space for me to think and reflect and process. I share it because I hope can encourage at least one other person who might perhaps be on a similar journey and be working through similar feelings.

Thank you for your patience as we work to get the blogs separated and then as I slowly work on getting back to writing and posting.

(if you are a friend or family member and would like access to the other blog, you can contact me to be added to the list. you'll need a google email address/google profile.)

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Seven.

C.S. Lewis once said, “You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.” I may disagree with him about the *length* of books (certain ones like Les Miserables were tough for me to get through!), but I can agree that you can never have too many books. Although I still have quite a few books around the house that are waiting to be read, these are a few that I've had my eye on recently.

1. Jesus Feminist by Sarah Bessey (coming out in November 2013)

2. Crazy for God: How I Grew Up as One of the Elect, Helped Found the Religious Right, and Lived to Take All (or Almost All) of It Back by Frank Schaeffer

3. A Circle of Quiet by Madeleine L'Engle

4. Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood: Practical Parenting from Birth to Six Years by Jim Fay and Charles Fay

5. AWOL: The Unexcused Absence of America's Upper Classes and How It Hurts Our Country by Kathy Roth-Douquet and Frank Schaeffer

6. [Untitled - Third Book in Divergent Trilogy] by Veronica Roth (coming out Fall 2013)

7. Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by Mindy Kaling

Monday, January 21, 2013

guest post: Improving A Veteran's Health

Things have been a little slow on the blog lately as we have been recovering from the holidays, getting over some illness and discussing some changes in our future. However when Emily Walsh, the Community Outreach Director for the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance, contacted asking if she could guest post here about healthy lifestyles for veterans, I was more than happy to oblige! Below the article there's a short bio about Emily and a link to read more of her writing so be sure to check that out!

If you have served in the military, there is no way that anyone can repay your debt.

While most veterans are proud of their accomplishment, many of them leave the

military and suffer from a number of military-related ailments. PTSD, mesothelioma

and other problems are common for veterans of all ages. It does not matter the

branch of military you served in or what you did while serving, you still need to take

care of yourself when you are not on active duty. There are several things you can

do yourself that will improve the entire quality of your life.

One thing you can do that will improve your life is to exercise more often. Many

people, especially veterans, tend to become very sedentary later on in life. You may

find yourself working a desk job or dealing with a disability that causes you to stay

home all day. Whatever the case, there is an exercise out there that you can do.

Even veterans who are in wheelchairs can exercise often and should get out of the

house in order to do so. Getting out into the fresh air or joining a busy local gym are

two ways for you to feel good and bring more physical activity into your life.

Your diet can also affect the way you look, feel and live. A poor diet filled with junk

and processed foods is not good for anyone and can cause major weight problems

and diabetes. The best way to avoid these problems is to simply change your diet

and watch your weight carefully. Try to avoid going on fad diets that only offer

temporary results. Instead, aim to change the way you eat and feast on more

wholesome foods each day. For example, swap out white rice with brown and switch

to sweet potatoes and ditch the white kind. You'll find that these easy changes make

for amazing results.

Your doctor should also be consulted and visited on a routine basis. Your doctor is

the only one who is going to be able to tell you if there is anything wrong with you or

if you need to be put on any type of medication. If you're suffering with PTSD,

anxiety or depression, you should bring these things up when in the office. If you're

dealing with physical problems, your doctor can either perform surgery, send you for

physical therapy or even prescribe you a medication.

You should be doing everything in your power to ensure a healthy and productive

life. There is no reason for you to sulk at home even if you have an emotional,

mental or physical disorder. There are quite a few things you can do at home for

yourself that will improve your health and well-being. This is why you need to

implement these changes and make them part of your life so that you can become a

more whole individual. Veterans, especially, need to look over their health more

carefully than normal people out there.

As the Community Outreach Director for the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance, Emily Walsh dedicates much of her time building cancer awareness through social media and blogging. To read more from Emily go to www.mesothelioma.com/blog/authors/emily/.

Thanks again, Emily, for the great information!

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

newtown

Tonight I rocked my baby to sleep and simultaneously read the names of the victims of yesterday's horrible,

horrible crime.

Charlotte Bacon, 6

The names were unfamiliar. But I read each one slowly, tears streaming.

Daniel Barden, 7

At some point, six or seven years ago, these names were carefully and joyfully selected as parents welcomed these little ones. Like all parents, I'm sure they worked hard to find the perfect name.

Olivia Engel, 6

When you're picking out a baby name, you think about how it will sound on their first day of school, on a blind date, on a wedding invitation.

Josephine Gay, 7

You never imagine having to see your child's name listed as a murder victim. And you should never have to.

Ana M. Marquez-Greene, 6

After each name, a number. A number that is just another reminder of how cruel this was.

Dylan Hockley, 6

6's and 7's. Single digits. "Mere babies," I keep saying to myself.

Madeleine F. Hsu, 6

Each of these children was once a babe being rocked to sleep by their parents, just as I sit with my son.

Catherine V. Hubbard, 6

I kiss his rosy little cheeks. I whisper love to him. I watch him sleep peacefully, safe in my arms.

Chase Kowalski, 7

But my heart aches oh so much for those other mamas. For their unspeakable grief.

Jesse Lewis, 6

For the young lives cut short. For younger ones who don't understand and ask for their older siblings. For the town who mourns together. For children who are terrified to go back to school.

James Mattioli, 6

I have cursed and I have cried. "It's not fair," I weep. "Why should my baby still be here when someone else loses theirs?"

Grace McDonnell, 7

Every moment I shower my sweet boy with love because I know that those mamas and papas wish they could do the same to their babies.

Emilie Parker, 6

But I feel so, so guilty. Because my baby is still here. Because their hearts are wrenched with pain tonight as I sit here with a safe, living and breathing child.

Jack Pinto, 6

Prayers are ached out from my grieving heart. The words to my prayers getting caught in my throat before they reach my lips because there simply are no words that suffice.

Noah Pozner, 6

Stinging tears run down my face as I again look at those names.

Caroline Previdi, 6

"What would their mamas want?" I wonder "If their daddies were here, what would they say?"

Jessica Rekos, 6

I can only guess. But I'd guess they'd want them to be remembered.

Avielle Richman, 6

I would guess that they would want people to know and speak and remember their name. They would want them to be remembered for their LIFE and not for their death.

Benjamin Wheeler, 6

Read the names. Remember the lives.

Allison N. Wyatt, 6

Remember also the brave women who died, trying to protect these little ones.

Rachel Davino

Dawn Hochsprung

Anne Marie Murphy

Lauren Russeau

Mary Sherlach

Victoria Soto

Monday, December 3, 2012

new journal. new pens.

Sunday, December 2, 2012

advent prayer

This week while searching for an Advent prayer, I stumbled across this one. The words are lovely and encompass so much of God's character and the things for which we wait. We used part of it this morning in Church with the Advent reading, prayer and candle lighting.

A Prayer For the First Sunday of Advent

Christine Sine (source: http://godspace.wordpress.com/2011/11/21/a-prayer-for-the-first-sunday-of-advent-2011/)