"fearlessly expanding the feminine voice"

When I first joined the Redbud Writers Guild, I saw this phrase on their website: 

"Fearlessly expanding the feminine voice in our churches, communities, and culture."

That resonated with me.

Because even though I have a voice and I want to use it, I am still timid about speaking up in the catholic (read: universal) Church. 

Perhaps this is curious to you.

You might be asking one of two questions:

1.  Why does the feminine voice need to be expanded?

2.  Why would anyone be fearful about using their voice?

I write today from a place of love - I am not angry or bitter as I write these words.  But I do want to explain why that phrase resonated with me and why I think the catholic Church needs to intentionally make steps to be more inclusive to women. 

*****

I am the researcher in our family.

I have researched everything from housing options to strollers, partly because I think researching is fun and partly because I want to make wise, informed decisions for our family.

So when we moved to Omaha it was only natural that I started researching churches.  I would collect all the information and then talk through each church with my husband, pulling up their websites so he could look too.

I scoured their websites and listened to podcasts of previous sermons.  I downloaded bulletins and researched their childcare policies.  

And I always read about the pastors.  At that point, we were only considering churches who had male pastors.

That's when I noticed a sad trend.

As I looked at their book recommendations, and as I searched their social media accounts, all the Christian authors, pastors, and speakers they recommended and were connected with were men.  On a very long booklist, I saw only one female author mentioned, but only about "female issues" (i.e. one book on the wife's side of marriage and one book on parenting)

These pastors didn't have women speaking into their lives.

Of course, you could argue that my method for finding this out wasn't the most accurate. You could say that who someone follows on Twitter is an arbitrary way of finding out who they listen to.

But I think it is indicative of more.

Are these men doing it intentionally? 

I don't think so.  

But they are ignoring half of the church.

Intentionally or not, it sends the message that not only should women not teach, they also don't have anything valuable to add to theology or Christianity.


*****

I attended a church with all male pastors.  That wasn't an oversight, it was what they believed.

This church sent a group of their pastors overseas to mentor local pastors in a country where the government is trying to repress Christianity, yet it was flourishing.

When I saw a picture of the trip, I laughed.  A tiny room of someone's apartment was packed, wall-to-wall with women.

The church set a group of all male pastors (men who believed that only men should be pastors) to teach a group of all FEMALE pastors.  Really, it was comical.

They came home talking about how much God was doing in this country.  How amazing it was!

I wondered if these men ever considered that they had half of their team benched.  And maybe, just maybe they would play a better game if they used all their players.

Did they consider these female pastors second-best?  Did they think God was only using women because He couldn't find any men in the country?  Or does God just use people? People who love Him and are committed to Him.

When I tried to bring this up to someone, it was excused as "cultural".

Instead of laughing, I got angry that time.  But I didn't press the argument because no one wanted to be pressed on it.

Passages about women being silent in church and men alone being pastors were taken literally at this church.  If I had tried to say that those passages didn't apply today because they were cultural and were written to people over 2,000 years before, this church would have said that I was denying biblical truth.

Yet here we were, two churches at the exact same point in history, and the difference could be dismissed as cultural?


*****

She laughed as she told me, "When they gave me the job, they called me the children's minister, but if they had hired a man, the position would have been children's pastor."

Exact same job description.  Exact same work load.  Exact same responsibilities.

Different title.

Whether or not that woman was called a pastor, she was pastoring.

It was semantics.

*****


I've heard it in college.  I've heard it in churches.

A prophet just means a preacher.

They say this when we're studying the Old Testament prophets, of course.

They don't mention the six women in the Bible who are called prophets.

They don't mention that Act 2 quotes Joel saying that a sign of the Holy Spirit coming will be that "sons and daughters will prophesy" (emphasis mine).

They don't mention I Corinthians where Paul calmly gives instructions for when (not if) women prophesy in Church.

So...a prophet means a preacher, unless that prophet is a woman?

*****

When I've said these things to people before, I usually hear one thing from them.

"Don't you think it is self-seeking?  Don't you think women just want these things because they want attention?  Aren't we called to humility?"

Here is my answer: It can be self-seeking.  They may simply want attention.  And yes, we are called to humility.

But all of these thing can be said for men as well.

Yet when I've seen men who say they feel called to preach or called to the ministry, I see them encouraged.  People are excited about it.

But women?

When a woman says she feels called to ministry (or to preach), her motives are immediately questioned.  Her character is vetted.  She has to prove herself over and over again.  

These women aren't always self-seeking.  In fact, often it is a bold step of faith for them to simply say aloud that they feel called to preach - they know the reception they will receive.

A person's motives may not be pure when they decide to become a pastor, but I think that has much less to do with their gender and more to do with their character.

*****

Do you see the need to expand the feminine voice yet?  And do you see why sometimes we are fearful about using our voices?

Regardless of what is said, the feminine voice isn't always welcome in the Church.

My Writing Process (a blog tour!)

I'm excited to share about my writing process today! I was tagged in a blog tour and, as I reviewed the questions, I thought they would be good for me answer and also fun for readers to get a glimpse into my head as I plan and write posts.  

I was tagged by fellow Air Force wife, Jessica of Jessica Lynn Writes.  I have been reading Jessica's blog for several years now (since before either of us had children!).  When I started reading her blog, they were stationed in Italy, which is one of the places we would love to be stationed some day.  Jessica's blog is one of my favorites and I read every post she writes!

The ladies I am tagging in this tour are fellow members of the Redbud Writers Guild, which I joined a few months ago and have found to be the most gracious and helpful group.  Julie Holly blogs at Peacequility and this post describes exactly how I felt when I first joined the Redbuds, although she says it much better than I did.

Jamie Rohrbaugh is not only a writer, but also a pianist who recently released a CD and you can listen to samples here.  I love The Weight of Glory, which is number seven.

I am moved by the writing and honesty of Melody Harrison Hanson.  Here's a line from one of my favorite posts:  "I am learning about boundaries, mostly that I am terrible with them. I do for others until I resent the doing ending up with no time to write or think or pray or sit with the Holy One."  You really should read her whole post though.

And now (finally!) to the questions!

(This picture wasn't posed and wasn't even taken with this post in mind, but I wanted to mention that on the left is a book written by another Redbud, Leslie Leyland Fields.)

What am I working on as a writer?

Consistency and Balance!  I struggle putting ample time into my blog when I'm also doing freelance articles.  I work painstakingly on the articles getting it just right and I'm glad that I do - I usually end up being very pleased with them so it is worth the effort.  However, I don't have the same attitude with my blog.  I don't agonize if I can't get a sentence just right.  I am not sure how to treat my blog writing as seriously as my freelance writing without getting bogged down.  

Also, I am working on taking myself more seriously.  I still haven't had the courage to call myself a writer aloud (other than to my husband!).  And I feel torn between wanting more time to write and (on frustrating days when I'm tired) just wanting to put my feet up and veg out to Netflix when my son naps.

How does my work differ from others of its genre?

I am not quite sure how to answer this one, but here's my attempt: I differ because I write broadly.  I don't fit into just one category. One day I write about military life, and the next about Christianity.  Then it will be a book review, a recipe, or a post about feminism.  I don't consider myself a mommy blogger (although I am a mama) or a lifestyle blogger (because I don't really write about everyday life) or a religion blogger (because I write many posts that don't contain a religious aspect).

Why do I write what I do?

Often I write to inform or help someone else.  My most popular post is a guide for PCSing, and I'm glad that people have found it helpful.  I'm also considering writing more on my erythromelalgia, not because I'm terribly interested in sharing more about it, but because there isn't a lot of information available about this syndrome - most doctors haven't even heard of it!  My few blog posts on the topic have generated a lot of traffic, which means people are looking for help dealing with the pain.  If I can help someone, I want to do it.

Other times I write to understand and to figure myself out.  My thoughts develop as I go through the writing process just as they used to when I journaled.

And, finally, I write to declare.  To be brave.  I write because there are things that I want to say, but I don't know how to say them aloud.  I'm always afraid that when someone meets me after reading my blog, they'll be disappointed by the real me.  I'm not particularly eloquent in person.... 

How does my writing process look?

On my phone I keep a list of ideas for blog posts.  That way wherever I am I can hurry and write it down before I forget.  Right now I have about 15-20 ideas on the list, which seems to be pretty standard.
I try to use the weekends to plan the posts for the upcoming week.  In the picture above you can see my calendar hanging behind my computer.  That's where I keep track of blog posts, guest posts and proposals.  It gives me a good visual of how many times I've posted and what type of posts they have been. 

Usually I try to have at least two posts written on the weekend so they're ready to go.  The night before they go up, I review them quickly.  Then I spend Monday and Tuesday working on posts for the last few days of the week.  I should clarify that this is my *goal*.  It doesn't always happen this way and sometimes (like last week) I end up scrambling to post something at the last minute or publishing something I just wrote.  I prefer to have posts written ahead of time so that they can sit for a few days before I review them and post them.

When I'm writing an article, I start by outlining what I think it will look like and then start filling in.  It usually ends up very different from the original. :)  The writing itself is not usually too difficult, but the editing is painstaking.  I review it countless times.  I read it aloud to myself.  I make other people read it for me.  It is a long process that I actually adore.  All my finicking and fussing is rewarded when I am able to find the right word or get the paragraph just-so.  

Tell me about your writing process?  Do you have any tips for me?

I'm a Redbud!

Earlier this week I found out that I was accepted into the Redbud Writers Guild, a collection of Christian women bloggers, authors and speakers.  I am thrilled!  I had applied a few months ago and hadn't heard back so I assumed I hadn't been accepted.  When I got the email, my excitement was immediately followed by the most profound sense of humility.  Just by looking through the short biographies, you can tell that this is an incredible group of women who are gifted in communication.  I'm a beginning writer so I know I have a lot to learn from them.

That's what drew me to the Redbuds in the beginning though - I was told that members are at different levels as writers and this group was created to encourage and nurture each other.  After just a few days, I can tell that this is a special group of women and I'm excited to learn from them.

I'd love for you to connect with more Redbuds via the website, Facebook or Twitter!